We All Can't Be Kirks
by tripwasmyhero2161
Summary: The team was on the usual mission looking for ZPMs. Will the team gain a ZPM and lose a McKay? Rated K. Only One Chapter. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!


DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own anything that is in the Stargate franchise. I, like everyone else, wished they did own some small part, but I cannot say I do.

We All Can't Be Kirks

Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard, Dr. Rodney McKay, Teyla, and Ronan were on a routine mission. They needed to find ZPM's to power Atlantis.

They gated to a planet with a somewhat advance civilization that was much like Earth. The only difference was the Stargate was out in the open and not hidden under a mountain.

The puddle jumper landed near the gate. As soon as John, Rodney, Teyla, and Ronan stepped out of the jumper, they were greeted.

"Hello." A young woman said.

"Hi." John said.

"I don't mean to be rude, but who are you?" She asked.

"Oh, yes, I'm Sheppard, this is McKay, and that's Teyla and Ronan." John said pointing to each member of his team.

"My name is Tala, I'm am the leader of the people here on Baluxia. Welcome." She said. She was young. Her long brown hair blew in the wind.

"Well, we're glad to be here." John said.

"Please, come. Our midday meal is about to begin. We would be honored if you could join us." She said.

"We'd be honored." John said.

They sat at a large table among many under a large tent.

"Where are you from?" Tala asked.

"Atlantis." John said.

"You are from the ancestral city?" Tala asked.

"Yes." John said.

"Then we are truly honored to be in your presences." She said bowing her head. "It has been many generations since the Ancestors have been to Baluxia. We only have stories left."

"Thanks." John said. "I guess."

"What is this? It's so good." Rodney asked.

"It's a byproduct of one of our livestock." She said.

"Well, it's really good." Rodney said.

"You'll have to excuse my friend." John said. "The reason we're here is to see if you have a ZPM."

"What is a ZPM?" She asked.

"It's an energy source that uses sub-space to draw energy." Rodney explained.

"If we did have a 'ZPM', we wouldn't know. We have never heard of it." Tala said.

"How old is your civilization?" Rodney asked.

"We have lasted many generations, since the creation of our world." She said.

"Do you have records going back to that date?" Rodney asked.

"Yes, but we cannot read it. It is in the old dialect. No one left can read it." Tala explained.

"Well, we might as well take a look." Rodney said.

Tala took them to a large building.

"This is the Hall of Records." Tala said.

She took them up the stairs to a long hallway with only one door all the way at the end of the hall.

"This room contains the oldest records of our civilization." Tala said. "Most of our records are Census Records, we think that these are the same."

Rodney picked up a few of the tablets. "It's Ancient."

"You can read it?" She asked.

"Yes, well, I learned it—" Rodney started.

"Rodney." John said to make him stop talking and start working.

"You must be a very wise man." Tala said. She moved closer to him as if his genius would rub off.

"Yes. Well, maybe people depend on me." He said. He looked at Tala, she moved closer to him.

"What do the tablets say?" Tala asked. She smiled at Rodney in awe.

He looked over the tablet. "They seem to be records of—" He paused.

"What is it?" She said.

Rodney picked up tablet after tablet. He read each of them. "Test experiments. The Ancients were here. They did their experiments here."

"Tests? Like our tests?" She asked. She looked between John and Rodney as she waited for an answer.

"What tests?" Rodney asked her. He finally looked away from the tablets to look at her.

"We test our youth to place them." Tala explained.

"Their intelligence?" Rodney asked. "You have IQ tests?"

"IQ?" Tala asked.

It's an intelligence test." Rodney said.

John didn't want to break up their little conversation that was meaningless to their mission, but he didn't want to listen to them.

"Do you mind if we look around? So you two can work." John asked.

"Our world is beautiful this time in our revolution." Tala said. "The gardens are in full bloom."

John, Teyla, and Ronan left the hall and Rodney and Tala continued to work.

KIRKKIRKKIRKKIRKKIRK

A few hours later, Rodney found Teyla, Ronan, and John outside in one of the many gardens.

"All done?" John said when he saw Rodney.

"I know where the ZPM is!" Rodney said with pride.

"And they'll just let us take it?" John asked.

"Like Tala said, they don't even know what it is." Rodney said.

"How about we ask, just to be sure." John walked past Rodney. He was going to fine Tala and make sure everything was in order.

"It's not like they have a use for it and we need a ZPM. It's a win-win situation." Rodney said. He had to catch up with John.

"Remember the last time this happened?" John asked. Rodney didn't say a word. He looked away. "How about we go find Tala?"

They spotted her coming out of the Hall of Records.

"Tala, can we have a word?" John asked her.

"Of course." She looked at all the members of the team. "I thought you would be looking for the ZPM by now."

"Yes, but we just wanted to make sure it was okay that we take the ZPM." John asked.

"Of course." Tala said. Rodney had a smug look on his face. "We have no use for it."

Rodney, John, Teyla, and Ronan left to get the ZPM.

"Dr. McKay, where is the ZPM?" Teyla asked.

"Well, it's…" He looked at his pad. "Across that field, there." He pointed.

"Just sitting in the open?" Ronan asked.

"Sitting out in the open? Do you really think the Ancients were that stupid?" Rodney asked.

They walked across the field. Eveyone looked at Rodney.

"Okay, the ZPM should be right…here." Rodney said pointed down. "It should be right here."

"Do you really think that the Ancients were that stupid, just to leave a ZPM sitting out in the open?" Ronan repeated. Rodney looked like he was going to talk back, but he had a fear of being hurt.

"Maybe it's underneath the ground or with a cloaking device." Rodney suggested.

"Didn't you read anything about this?" John asked.

"They didn't say. They probably wanted to conceal the location of the ZPM from unwanted visitors." Rodney explained.

"Can't you detect it with you tricorder thingy?" John asked.

"What is this?" Star Trek?" Rodney yelled at John. "Tricorder? Are you serious?"

"It's just, you usually know about this kind of thing, more than me, or any of us do." John said. He pointed to Teyla and Ronan.

Rodney looked around, he looked up and down. He shifted the dirt under his feet.

"It could be below, just like on Dagon." He suggested.

Rodney jumped. He expected to hear nothing, but he wanted just to make sure. When he landed he heard a metal thud.

Rodney moved a thin layer of dirt.

A metal object with Ancient writing was unearthed.

"It's the ZPM!" He said. "I found it!"

Rodney crouched down to get a better look at it. He pushed down on it, but nothing happened.

"Sheppard, maybe you should." Rodney stepped back. John got closer to it and pushed down the metal. The small lid popped up to reveal a ZPM.

John picked it up and handed it to Rodney. He put it in his pouch.

"Now that we have out ZPM, maybe we should go." John said.

"Go? Why?" Rodney asked. "Don't we want to learn more about their culture?"

"But we got what we came for." John said.

"Let's at least say good bye." Rodney said. They walked back to the city.

"Tala!" Rodney called out when they reached the city.

"Dr. McKay." She said waving. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

"Yes." Rodney said. "Thank you for all your help."

"Of course." She kissed him on the cheek. "Are you sure you do not want to stay for testing?" Tala asked Rodney.

"Well…" Rodney started. He looked to John for approval.

"Can you excuse us for a moment?" John and the team moved aside. "Are you seriously considering taking this test?"

"Well, I was thinking about it." Rodney said.

"McKay, no you can't. You have to return to Atlantis. Atlantis needs Rodney McKay." John said.

"And I will return to Atlantis after I take the test." Rodney said.

"Do you realize that they will want you to stay after you take this test?" John asked him.

"That didn't cross my mind." Rodney said.

"Then we should leave." John said. Rodney said no more and walked behind John.

"Thank you for your help, but we really need to be going now." John said. "I hope that our peoples can work together and trade in the future."

The returned to the jumper and returned to Atlantis.

"How did it go?" Elizabeth asked.

"We got the ZPM and almost lost Rodney." John said.

"Well, we can dicuss that in the debriefing." She said.

KIRKKIRKKIRKKIRK

As soon as their visitors left, Tala said to another woman, "did you get his DNA?"

"Yes, ma'am, I got DNA from all three males." The other woman said.

"Good Let's begin." Tala said. She turned to walk into the Hall of Records.


End file.
